A Profile On Phantom Black Cap.

The last to be born of a litter of 10 kittens found in a cardboard box up a back alley that lead to many back yards of many dark and dingy houses.  Black and White colouring with distinctive black mask stretching eye to eye up to ear to ear, fading slightly but neatly into the back of his head. Large and butch in statue, probably born of his upbringing as a member of one of the most fearsome fighting families known to cat kind; that being none other than the Meow Madons. He earnt his name Phantom Black Cap due to his innovative way of fighting. By sneaking up on his opponent and taking them by surprise he had the advantage over them and since learning this skill had never lost a fight. He had become the Achilles of the cat world!

It could be said he had a certain charm about him that mislead many vulnerable female felines to lose their fine lithe shapes and turn into binge eating rolly pollys, either due to him dumping them at short notice causing emotional compensational scoffing or because of natures way of reproducing!!

Whatever the case on Phantom, it could always be said he was a difficult character to get to know and few, if any, did actually know him! His loner lifestyle seemed to suit him well. It was as though he had one mission in life and that was to be a territorial fighter that had no room for emotional baggage in the form of romance or friends!

After fighting all his brothers in one go, he left the family bonds behind and made his own way travelling from place to place being picked up by kind people where he stayed for food and shelter until it was time for him to move on again. He never looked back or contacted any from his past including his 9 brothers. From time to time he was put in Pudwood Scrubs to do time for crimes against Feline Rights and theiving from OAPs (old aged pudeneers).

His Mother was rather plain-looking but had a strong pull on the opposite sex, hence knew the ropes as regards large litters! She had strong survivor instincts that was passed on to all her progeny.

His Father was unknown, but thought to be a big black un-friendly cat that was passing through the district one night.

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The Achilles of The Cat World!…

Episode Five

Sitting 60 cats tails away black cap was licking his wounds. The way Tabatino handled himself gave the phantom ‘paws’ for thought. It might not have been a good idea to pounce so close to home, but he could not help himself after the incident at the club. It took a lot of  restraint just to walk out of there after Catchem  had had a word. It would seem that doing time had only strengthened his insatiable urge to fight, as his inmates can testify!

Back in his home town, his family, the meow madons, were renown for their fighting skills. Black cap was the youngest of ten and had great difficulty learning to fight. His brothers bullied him mercilessly, until one night after a bad bounce up, he struck while they were having a nap; taking them completely by surprise he managed to get away without a mark but they were left badly bruised and shaken! He had finally gained their respect!  later, this  earned him the unrivaled name phantom because he struck his victims from out of nowhere and never lost a fight! He became the Achilles of the cat world.

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A Profile On Catchem Mouse.

Found by the side of a very busy motorway road by kind passer bys’. Only 6 weeks old and very weak he was given to the nearest RSPCA hospital for attention.

After many weeks of nursing, he was rehomed to a young family who fell for his big sorrowful blue eyes.

For a while all was well and Catchem Mouse earnt his name by being a champion mouse catcher! The family having broken english would shout ” Hey dair boy, catch ’em mouse!” when a mouse was seen,  hence the name stuck as said! Catchem soaked up the praise he got and soon grew into a strong muscular black stealth mouse tracker.

Sadly this did not last, the family got caught up with long hours working for material things and became obsessed with sport in their spare time, to the point that Catchem was neglected and he had to resort to creeping into neighbours homes to cadge food from them or worse still, taking food from fellow pud puds dishes by sneaking in through their cat flaps!

This went on for some weeks until it was obvious his dear family no longer wanted him; they didn’t even notice when he bought in a champion catch the size of a rabbit! So Catchem decided to walk the streets, taking food where he could and eating his catches. Survival was tough and the longing for strokes and a warm place to sleep lay heavy in his heart.

One night in deep dark December as Catchem was pouncing on a large mouse he became aware that he was being watched. His first instinct was to puff up his hair and tail ready to defend himself – as that’s how it is on the streets–fight first ask questions later! However he was taken by surprise when a voice came back from the shadows in praise.. ” Nice catch, I couldn’t have done better myself!” Then out of the blackness came a fine good-looking Tabby,  in fact it was none other than the Tabby Tabatino. He moved like a cat who knew how to take care of himself as he walked a wide circle around Catchem, looking him up and down, then stopped slowly about 20 paws away in front of him. Catchem was still a little nervous of this “Dark Knight” in gleaming tabby apparel, so he continued to brace himself for a bounce up but he was taken aback again as Tabby spoke with a clear sincerity and said ” I could do with a cat like you to mind my new Club Bicardi Night Venue; I’d pay you well with in-house shelter and unlimited food/drink and entertainment if you’d be my bouncer, – just in case there’s trouble, if you know what I mean?”  Catchem Mouses expression changed so dramatically he forgot the mouse he was holding and it quickly bolted free, but like a streak of lightning Tabby had it in his paws which made Catchem’s jaw drop and his eyes nearly popped out of his head!

“Hey where did you learn to do that?” he asked Tabby Tabatino in a rather shaky shocked voice.  Tabby walked towards Catchem and handed him his catch “You come and work for me and I’ll teach you alot of things, we could be real good friends I reckon!.”

Catchem made the right decision and the rest is history….

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Attacker Exposed!

Tabatino files episode four.

As Tabatino lay stretched out in the baking heat of the conservatory recovering gracefully from the stacks of attention he had received from his owners and vet; he contemplated the evening before. Suddenly he felt a  tingle run through his whiskers as the realization struck him – his attacker was the new comer he had seen  talking to Catchem at the club. He was recalling the black-capped face of the offender, when he was distracted by a tap on the window; it was Pussy Galore at the conservatory door,  the lead singer for the Pussy Cat Tails – the finest  “puss rock” band  at Club Bicardi, and she looked desperate to talk to him. Tabatino jested toward the flap and Pussy shot in almost stumbling over herself as she spat out the news.

It appears that Pouchy Puss from 6 gardens up (approx 180 cat tails for those in the know ) had heard the fight and had called for Pud Pud Plod to investigate; Pouchy had been a bit worst for ware though and mistakenly directed Pud Pud back to the club where he managed to speak with Catchem. After some debate about the why and wherefores of the fight, a tracking order was put in place and it was confirmed by various Ferrel Bureau Investigators (FBI) that Tabatino had been attacked and the villain had been no less than the Phantom Black Cap from Pudwood Scrubs!

The worst was yet to come—- he only lived two doors up from Tabatino.

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Trouble at the club.

Tabatino Files. Episode Three.

Earlier that night at Tabatino’s club Bacardi, there had been an incident. Tabatino had to ask Catchem Mouse, head of security, to intervene in an argument that was getting out of hand with a new member. As he was soothing the situation, Catchem  caught a look in the opponents eyes that had put him on his guard, then without warning the new comer  moved with lightning speed,  taking Catchem completely by surprise, he instinctively stepped to one side to counter the attack, but no one was there, the culprit was headed towards the exit.

On the other side of the club, Tabatino was being distracted by a group of  feline babes  but had managed to watch the closing moments of  Catchem being taken by surprise. What he saw troubled him, but before this thought could take hold he was distracted by one of the fems in the group.

The club was very busy, one of the best nights this season.

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A Profile on Tabby Tabatino


Tabby with peachy/red hues; black feet and boots; striking green eyes; Errol Flynn moustache; champion hunter of all creatures; able to climb any tree or vertical object with great speed; can catch flying creatures in flight by leaping 5 or 6 feet into the air from standstill; cool and clever; agile lithe and sexy; highly attractive to opposite sex; highly successful, charismatic,  owner of Club Bicardi; loves speed, fast bikes and cars; live music and female company; very fond of owners.

His father, feral hunter, wildly attractive to opposite sex, untamable.

His mother, irresistably beautiful kind and wise.

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Tabatino Files    Episode Two.

Sitting two gardens up (or sixty cat tails away for those in the know),was a large “butch” black and white cat. He sat washing his paws and smoothing down his hair that had been ruffled, with a smug look on his sly old face. He was new to the area having been rescued from Pudwood Scrubs by some kind but unsuspecting people who had no idea that he was renown for creeping up on other cats and pouncing on them, creating an unfair advantage to what amounted too an almighty great bounce up!! Hardly surprising, he had been given the name phantom black cap! The black cap bit coming from his distinctive furry black mask, stretching from eye to eye up to ear to ear, fading slightly but neatly into the back of his head! There had been great Meows of joy when he was carried out of Pudwood Scrubs.

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